The Fact is that Most men don’t know how to talk to girls and get them attracted.
Sure, they may be able to hold a conversation, have some nice small talk, and make a platonic new friend. But they don’t know how to use their words to spark a deeper level of interest and attraction in the girls they talk to.
Usually, their conversations are surface level at best. Even if they manage to breach deeper topics, they don’t breach those topics in the right way, or they don’t use those topics to push the conversation forward.
The Way Most Men Talk to Girls
Some Guys get it, some Don't.
Women can tell very quickly whether you “get it” or you don’t.
Those few men who “get it” see a different side of women than all the other guys who only see their polite and innocent sides. That’s how the guys who “get it” can do things that seem crazy to normal guys, like bang a girl in the club bathroom within minutes of meeting her, bring women home on just about every date, etc.
Women feel like these men understand them, and that they can be themselves around them. No judgments, no bullshit.
(If you’re reading this now, you’re that much closer to being one of the guys who “gets it”, if you aren’t already.)
And one of the biggest things that separate these guys from the rest is that they know how to talk to girls the right way – from the first words right on to the bedroom and on from there.
The way they communicate is markedly different from other guys.
On the flip side, here are the problems with the way most men talk to girls:
They’re platonic and friendly. There’s not even a hint of sexuality behind their words. Perhaps they don’t want to offend the girl, or maybe they’re just afraid of scaring her off if they come on too strong.
They never take risks. When they get into a good conversation, they stay there. They don’t try to change anything or move the conversation forward. Instead, they try to avoid messing things up so they can maintain that comfortable nice little conversation.
They have no purpose. They don’t know where to lead the conversation. They’re not sure how to move it forward from one spot to the next, and hooking up with a girl becomes a matter of pure luck. These guys don’t command the situation.
So now, you’re probably wondering how to talk to girls the right way…
Well, I’ll lay out a strategy that any guy can take and use to have better conversations with girls.
Let’s get into it…
1. Assume She’s Attracted Before You Even Say a Word
Most men wait for signs that a girl is attracted, but the men who “get it” assume she’s already into them before they say anything at all. Part of this is reference experience – they’ve witnessed beautiful girls be attracted to them time and again.
The other part of it is a core level of confidence. They know they’re a quality guy who adds value to everybody they talk to, and feel that they’ll be improving a girl’s day when they approach her. (When you’re just starting out, you can lean on the latter until you gather enough reference experiences).
Is she dressed nice? It’s because she’s trying to impress you. She’s playing with her hair? She’s into you. She’s standing with good posture? It’s because she wants you to notice her breasts and her butt popping out.
Compare this to the “innocent until proven guilty” nice guy approach. This guy writes off all those signs. For example: “Oh, she’s playing with her hair? She must just be adjusting it;” “She made eye contact with me? Oh well, she probably has a boyfriend.”
Here’s the kicker: When you assume women are attracted to you, you’ll start acting like it. You’ll make more sexual innuendos, lead women, have a sexier vibe, and put yourself in a position to succeed. You’ll be more comfortable interacting with women because you won’t be worried about picking up on their signs of attraction. What’s more, you won’t have to wonder about how to talk to girls – it will start to come naturally as you get in tune with your male instincts.
2. Communicate With a Sexy Vibe
If you don’t know how to communicate with a sexy vibe, women won’t see you in a sexual way. You’ll find it difficult to blast past that platonic level of conversation and get to the fun stuff (like having mind-blowing sex).
But if you can develop a sexy vibe around women, that will change.
You’ll notice that women look at you in a different way, are more open to spontaneous adventures with you (like casual sex), and are instantly sexually attracted to you.
Here’s how to talk to girls with a sexy vibe:
Speak to her with intent. Get in tune with why you wanted to talk to her in the first place (i.e. you thought she was sexy and wanted to meet her) and appreciate what you find sexy about her. Let those things come across in your words and eye contact so she knows exactly why you’re talking to her, even if you don’t come out and say it.
Talk slower. When you slow down your speech, you convey power, confidence, and sexiness. Plus, what you say seems more important.
Pause at the right time. A well-timed pause builds sexual tension, allows her to invest and talk about herself, and puts you in control of the pace of the conversation.
Hold eye contact. Focus on holding eye contact the majority of the time you’re talking to her.
3. Start the Conversation
Okay, now you have the non-verbal stuff down. But to talk to girls, you need to know how to start a conversation with a girl. Luckily, this isn’t all that complicated.
You don’t need any crazy pickup line or joke. Usually, the more simple, the better.
Just remember to communicate with a sexy vibe and assume attraction when you make the approach.
Here are some ways you can start conversations with a girl:
Be direct. Here, you tell her exactly why you’re approaching. For example, “Hey, I just saw you and thought you were really cute. I had to walk over and say hi.”
Situational. Here, you reference something going on in the environment around you. So if you’re at a rooftop bar overlooking the New York City skyline, you could say, “This view is crazy, huh? I’ve never seen anything like this before.”
Simple. Here, you keep it very simple. You just say, “Hey, how’s it going?” This is my favorite one for approaching girls at bars and clubs, but again, it’s important to come across with that sexual intent.
4. Keep the Conversation Focused on Her
You don’t need to talk all that much about yourself in your initial conversations with women. It’s better to keep things focused on them.
People like talking about themselves – it activates the same pleasure centers in the brain as food and money. And so, when she talks about herself around you, she’ll associate those good feelings with you.
It’s good to relate back to her with things about your life, but you don’t need to tell in-depth stories or go on and on. It’s better to keep talking about yourself to a minimum, relate back to her on a few things, and bring the conversation back over to her
5. Don’t Play It Safe
I’ve always said life is too short to play it safe. This maxim also holds true when you consider how to talk to girls.
Most guys play it safe in their conversations. Hell, it’s like they’re afraid to let the girl find out that they have a dick. But if you follow everything listed here, you won’t be playing it safe.
She’ll feel your intent come across in your conversations, follow your lead, and get attracted to you. And if she’s not all that into you? Well, every girl won’t be, no matter how good you are in conversation. But this strategy will help you find out whether or not she’s into you a lot quicker, and you won’t waste time with girls who never would’ve been into you anyway.
Wrapping Up How to Talk to Girls and Get Them to Bed…
Most guys don’t know how to talk to girls and get them attracted. It’s a shame for those guys, but a golden opportunity for the few guys willing to perfect their conversation skills and attract women with their words.